


lupus et canis et luna

by heavensenq



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, Marauders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-10
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-08-21 19:59:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16583117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heavensenq/pseuds/heavensenq
Summary: Transforming into a wolf is terrifying and excruciating, Remus knows that. He has known that since five years old. But he hasn't known how much less terrifying and excruciating it might've been with the company of a certain big black dog under the light of the cruel moon.





	lupus et canis et luna

Blackness, pure and piercing.  
_And then the pain._

Every time it comes and goes, and he manages to convince himself that next time it will be better, easier. But it's the same wrenching, grating, _burning_ agony, like every cell in his body has been set alight. Pain so irremedial, so final, shooting up his spine in sickening bursts. His throat is dry, a dull throb settling behind his eyes. His fingers are starting to shake, long green veins standing out against his greying skin. His vision is blurring. The pain is so intense, and his body starts to shake- he closes his eyes, praying for it to be over quickly. Sickness crawls up his thoat, the monster that lives within him scratching at his lips, starting to focus: the dry, scraping feeling under his skin, the blazing hum in his fingertips, the soreness of his throat.

He clenches his teeth. It will be over soon. _Please let it be over soon_. His voice is foreign to him, harsh and deep and husky.

Cold moonlight seeps through the gaps of the planks on the window, scorching his skin. The night is silent, peaceful, apart from the long screams, saturating the air, carrying to the castle, where Professor McGonagall sits at her desk, worrying, wondering what the poor boy might be going through.

Silence.  
And then.. footsteps. No, not footsteps, the footfalls are far too soft and frequent, and if it hadn't been for Remus's heightened senses, he wouldn't have notice them. He gripped tightly to the bed, knots of panic forming in his head, cold metal handcuffs cutting into his skin. 

The door swings open, and Remus's eyesight is tunneling, the corners grey and hazy. He can feel his body shaking violently, making the bed creak, and he is still screaming, even though his throat is hoarse and dry, and his mouth sore.

It is a large black dog, reaching halfway up the doorframe. It bounds towards Remus, eyes dark and manic, placing a big soft black paw against Remus's heaving chest, tugging at his restraints. 

'Please, no,' he says, but his voice is weak and shivering, barely a whisper. But the dog has somehow already unfastened them, barking so loudly all the while that Remus thinks his skull might crack open.  
The pain comes faster now, he can feel himself changing, his nose lengthening, ears sharpening, legs elongating. The tang of blood is on his tongue. The dog walks over, looking up into his eyes. He pushes his face into the wolf's paws. His eyes are grey, intelligent, smiling. The wolf bats at his nose, snarling. But the dog sits there, adamant. He is half the size of the wolf, and he already has a great gash under his eye sitting blood, but he stays, watching, waiting.

_A howl rips through the night._

______________________________________________

The morning comes bright and cold, and the two boys lay intertwined, fingernails caked with dried blood. Sirius is bleeding under his left eye, and his mouth is so sore and so dry, but _God, is it worth it_ , just to see the Remus wake up unafraid. He smiles. The sunlight is harsh and yellow, accentuating the gold in his hair and his skin.  
He cracks open an eye, then shuts it again as he sees Sirius' face so close to his. 'You shouldn't have done that, you prick.' he mutters. 'Could've got yourself fucking killed.' Sirius smiles in his infuriating way, cocking an eyebrow. 'Yeah, well I didn't,'

Remus says nothing.


End file.
